Stilettos and Sniper Rifles
by Gail Koger

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GENRE: Action/adventure/comedy/romance

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BLURB: I’ve been a Maricopa County Sheriff’s deputy for four years. Most folks don’t have a clue about what a cop deals with every day. Like a pack of attack chihuahuas, a monkey with a bad case of diarrhea, a hungry python, a Brahma bull named Bodacious and a six-foot iguana.

And that is just the critters. Now let me tell you about the two-legged varmints. Such as a three-hundred-pound biker who got a bit irate when I zapped him with a stun gun, or a murderous nun, and let’s not forget the senior citizens having an orgy. Ugh.

My personal life isn’t much better. Off duty I’m a ballroom dancer which everyone makes fun of. I love competitive dancing; I get to meet a lot of people who aren’t trying to kill me. Ok, there was one incident, but hey, shit happens. At a dance competition Detective Sergeant Dante Delgado waltzed into my life. My girly parts yelled yee-haw, he’s the one. Now, if I can only get him to do the tango with me.

Law enforcement isn’t for the fainthearted. Are you brave enough to enter my world?

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Excerpt:

Julie got out of the car covered head-to-toe in monkey shit. She threw her head back and let out a primal scream.

I watched a glob of poop slide off her nose and roll down her once immaculate uniform. Oh hell, she hated getting dirty. “What happened?”

“That crazy old coot says, ‘I’ve always wanted to play cops and robbers,’ and he turned on the sirens. Cheeta freaked out and shit all over us. My car stinks worse than an outhouse.”

I backed up a step. “Yeah, you do smell like you have been rolling in it.”

Slimy green feces splattered the side window.

I pointed to a hose. “Let’s rinse off the worse of it and see about getting Cheeta out of the car before he has a heat stroke.”

“Good idea.” She took off her splattered sunglasses. “I’m writing that bastard up for assault and he can come and get his own damn monkey.”

A giggle escaped me.

“It’s not funny.” Julie’s sunglasses slipped out of her hand, and she bent down to pick them up.

The sharp crack of a high-powered rifle reverberated off the houses.

A slug slammed into my chest, hurling me backward. I hit the ground hard, dimly aware of more shots being fired and Julie yelling, “Charlie-24 we are taking fire, officer down, need paramedics and backup.”

Sirens wailed in the distance.

Weird black spots danced in my vision. Who was groaning? Why couldn’t I breathe? I tried to move, but the pain was overwhelming. Up. Gotta get up. Someone was shooting at us.

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REVIEW: From the first page of Stiletto’s and Sniper Rifles I was laughing like crazy. All through the book. If this is what a police officer’s life is like, I feel sorry for them. But I’d laugh hearing about it. Entertaining, Stiletto’s and Sniper Rifles ended way too soon for me. I thought, I’ll just read a bit and finish it tomorrow. I did. At three in the morning after not finding a place to stop. Crazy characters, wild life and improbable (but I bet they’ve happened somewhere) Stiletto’s and Sniper Rifles stays true to pull out laughs with every page. One of the most entertaining books I’ve read in a long time.

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AUTHOR Bio and Links:

I was a 9-1-1 dispatcher for the Glendale Police Department and to keep from going totally bonkers – I mean people have no idea what a real emergency is. Take this for example: I answered, “9-1-1 emergency, what’s your emergency?” And this hysterical woman yelled, “My bird is in a tree.” Sometimes I really couldn’t help myself, so I said, “Birds have a tendency to do that, ma’am.” The woman screeched, “No! You don’t understand. My pet parakeet is in the tree. I’ve just got to get him down.” Like I said, not a clue. “I’m sorry ma’am but we don’t get birds out of trees.” The woman then cried, “But… What about my husband? He’s up there, too.” See what I had to deal with? To keep from hitting myself repeatedly in the head with my phone I took up writing.

Author links:

https://www.gailkoger.com
https://www.facebook.com/Colettiwarlordbooks/
https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/1598719.Gail_Koger
https://twitter.com/Askole
https://www.instagram.com/gkoger58/
https://www.bookbub.com/authors/gail-koger
http://www.amazon.com/Gail-Koger/e/B001K838BY

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GIVEAWAY INFORMATION and RAFFLECOPTER CODE

Gail Koger will be awarding $25 Amazon/BN GC to a randomly drawn winner via rafflecopter during the tour.

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